Mail Magazine vol.09

■Kumiko’s “In Search of the Transparent Sound”vol.9

I remember time and again the scenes when I was taking Prof. Sasaki’s lesson.
At that time, I was absorbed in taking his lesson weekly. I tried hard to acquire some clues to “ open an ear” from not only a slight piece of his lecture but also casual talks with other pupils.
“ What is to open an ear? “
I was always thinking about it.

It was almost impossible for me to express what and how I sensed. However, I felt as if I was surrounded by a transparent wall. In other words, I was afraid no matter how hard I struggle, I might not be able to reach what I want.

By keeping on taking his lesson and listening to the sound, I came to find something precious gradually. Such findings turned my heart a little bit bright and free. At the same time, I felt that the wall surrounding me collapsed little by little. Occasionally, it collapsed instantly! Just like the story about my struggle with Chopin’s music which I wrote in my essay vol.7.

On the other hand, I had some experiences when my sound space suddenly turned into a totally different one at the ultimate moment of confusion.

I had many crucial experiences like that.

One day , when I visited Prof. Sasaki to take his lesson, someone was playing the piano part of a piano concerto which I had never listened to.( piano concerto is a piece of music written for a piano, where the piano is accompanied by a whole orchestra) At the corner of the lesson room, I was appreciating her play quietly. All of a sudden,
“Kumiko, play the second piano!” he said to me.
“ Again! Stop annoying me!” I cried in my mind. But I could not say No to him anytime. I was scared of him.
“Yes, sir”
As the musical score was very complicated, it was obvious that I could not play as fast as she did. She was playing at almost finish tempo.
So I concentrated very hard on listening to her solo piano. Then I stroke reasonably some notes. Casting a look at the score from time to time, I played mostly like the score. For the most part, I stroke the notes which seemed to fit the first piano.

At last, we finished playing.
“ It was terrible! He’ll get mad at me” I was scared and waiting for his comments. Then,
“ I’m going to the toilet.” he said. And just before shutting the door,

“Playing at random, it’s superb!!” he added very joyfully.

As for myself, I remember that I was feeling a light of happiness far away in my heart while I was playing.

His words which made no sense to me at that time, stayed in my heart for a long time.

The sound expresses unexpectedly one’s deep consciousness.
When one’s consciousness is straight and transparent, his sound sparkles with his nature which he does not know himself.
However, his superficial consciousness cannot notice it in all likelihood.
What I had come to know through his lesson is that my sound became light, warm and transparent without any intention in the middle of confusion.
One of his words,” The music is the subconsciousness” has a very profound meaning.
I will tell you the unknown and wonderful nature of the sound and its application through various episodes.

See you soon!

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